As it rains today and a hint of Autumn chill is in the air, I have been trying to figure out why this type of weather seems to make me more aware of the frailty of life. Is it simply because flowers die off and the leaves change, or is it that the feeling of cold in the air makes you want to retreat and stay inside, or maybe it's that I am getting older and with each year and each life that I see pass by I realize that Earth is just a holding place for us to get "it" and be ready for eternity? So I ponder these questions, secretly knowing that the answers will be revealed to me, but not today and hopefully not tomorrow, but some day when I have gotten "it" right and ready and the Lord has said "well done".
I was reminded of this frailty last night at work. My patient delivered a baby who was shocked by how fast she entered this world and so shocked that breathing wasn't even a reflex for her. After a quick whisk off to a warmer-bed and some help with oxygen and a really great, fast NICU team she cried a little whimper that said "OK, I am here and ready to participate in this life." It still amazes me how resilient these creations of God are and teaches me too that HE IS IN CONTROL.
After a shift like that its hard to unwind when I get home so I went to check on some blogs that I like to read. I found a new one that was started by a family who just as the summer was starting had lost their daughter in an accident. As I read each entry of how they are creating their "new normal" I was in awe of the faith and strength that they have to move forward. How it reminded me again that this life is not the end, that the life to look forward to is in eternity and to live each day here with passion and patience for the coming. How wonderfully thought out He really is.
So today as I look for something to do besides clean my house and fold the laundry I decide to make a lemon meringue pie for Jackson because he really likes them. As I am stirring the saucepan waiting for the lemon sauce to boil my mom says on the phone to me "Grandma used to make lemon meringue pies". I never knew this about her. My mom said Grandma could really get some thick meringue. Well, mine is not as thick as hers but maybe some day it will be. Once again it shows me that families and generations come and go but deep under all of the hullabaloo of this life we are connected to that one string, the cord that God created to allow us to feed off of our moms, who fed off of theirs, who were wonderfully created to touch each other in simple ways like a pie or with the magnificent impact of life and death on Earth. All of this philosophy from a single day with rain and a hint of fall.
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